Writing asesment

Today we completed our Term 4 writing assessment. We had 5 minutes to plan, 30 minutes to complete our first draft and 5 minutes to proof read. Here Is what I wrote…
Believe it or not I can drive a car that has five gears and a clutch. About a year ago now my dad asked me if I wanted to go down to the river and see if I could drive his holden rodeo ute. So I said yea doubtfully and we drove down to the river. The he pulled the seat right forward and put the steering wheel right down and said jump in. So I hopped into the driver's seat. Then dad told me to touch the accelerator to get a feel for how hard to push it for what amount of revs. The the same with the clutch. Then I moved the gear shifter into first and slowly but surely started moving. Then when the ute got to 2.5 thousand rpm’s I put my foot onto the clutch and shifted into second. When it came to stopping dad told me to put my foot on the brake. But dad never told me to find the brake before I started. So I looked down at the pedals and while I was doing that I was going off the track into the grass. Now a year on I can drive a manual car without stalling and knowing where all the pedals are. I drive his ute round and round the track and use three of the five gears to drive the ute.Now I’m putting some of the road rules into play like stoping at junctions and making up stop sings and speed limits. I like driving cars because it give me better skills for when I get older.